They say love blinds you, but if you asked me, I’d tell you they all lied. Desire blinds you. Desperation blinds you. Fear blinds you. Love is just what we nickname it. We aren’t made to handle ugly truths. I did everything that they say one does after heartbreak. I cried. I screamed. I cursedContinue reading “wash, rinse, repeat.”
Category Archives: thoughts
journal twelve.
And I think what hurts the most is the forever I imagined — that forever with you. I think back to all those talks of being side by side forever, to all those jokes of our eventual, inevitable “I do.” Now all those conversations of exploring the world together, of growing old together are noContinue reading “journal twelve.”
journal eleven.
tell me how to breathe again. i’m holding my breath and i’m counting down but the numbers never stop ending. i forgot how to take a breath. inhale. out. hold. holdholdho—getaquickbreathin— i’m having to learn how to breathe again and i’m thinking thinking thinking all these no thoughts like how, can’t i just go backContinue reading “journal eleven.”
journal ten.
The setting is as follows: a cool Sunday, about late afternoon / early evening, wind is still blowing as New York wind does, but it’s not bad. There’s a group of three friends passing around a volleyball pretty badly, but they’re having fun. A couple lays down and cracks open two beers. A group ofContinue reading “journal ten.”
journal nine.
Let me write you a love letter. I’ll sign it with “xoxo,” that nickname you gave me so long ago, and maybe a spritz of perfume—give you something to remember me by. I’ll start it with “To my beloved” and finish that off with “babe”… no, “lover”… maybe your name, but that’s too casual, no?Continue reading “journal nine.”
journal eight.
I’ve stopped closing my curtains at night. And in the morning, I wake up to bright light, but it’s not harsh. It’s fresh, delicate and deliberate, touching all the sins of the past night away. Anew. A bird takes a dive from the rooftop across my fire escape but in the next second, swoops up,Continue reading “journal eight.”
journal seven.
Dear That Certain No One In Particular, I’m sitting at a really long, solid wood desk on the lower floor of my fancy office situated amongst the expensive high-rises on 5th Ave trying to figure out how to work this platform all my tasks run on and unfortunately just getting more confused in the meantime.Continue reading “journal seven.”
journal six.
Happiness is such a luxury, let me tell you. I have found it in the touching buildings and inch-separated, parallel parked cars that line my morning walk from 2nd Ave to Ave A, in the car honks and ambulance sirens that have become my white noise to fall asleep to, in the breath of fresh,Continue reading “journal six.”
journal five.
She was a firecracker. Radiant where she walked. She was self destructive. Bursting apart from the inside out. She was an enigma. She was strong. In her words that said no. But they were built out of wood; they wouldn’t last long. One Jenga block pull away from collapsing. She was weak. In action. InContinue reading “journal five.”
journal four.
We don’t fall in love with people. We fall in love with moments—with the calm of hands running through hair, with the tickle of laughter against skin, with the warmth of a body nearby. We don’t fall in love with people. We fall in love with moments—with the hours that feel like mere minutes thatContinue reading “journal four.”
brittany given. 